Grumpy Old Sod Dot Com - an internet voice for the exasperated. Sick of the nanny state? Pissed off with politicians? Annoyed by newspapers? Irate with the internet? Tell us about it!

Send us an email
Go back
11th September 2013: The world's gone mad and I'm the only one who knows
13th August 2013: Black is white. Fact. End of.
11th August 2013: Electric cars, not as green as they're painted?
18th June 2013: Wrinklies unite, you have nothing to lose but your walking frames!
17th May 2013: Some actual FACTS about climate change (for a change) from actual scientists ...
10th May 2013: An article about that poison gas, carbon dioxide, and other scientific facts (not) ...
10th May 2013: We need to see past the sex and look at the crimes: is justice being served?
8th May 2013: So, who would you trust to treat your haemorrhoids, Theresa May?
8th May 2013: Why should citizens in the 21st Century fear the law so much?
30th April 2013: What the GOS says today, the rest of the world realises tomorrow ...
30th April 2013: You couldn't make it up, could you? Luckily you don't need to ...
29th April 2013: a vote for NONE OF THE ABOVE, because THE ABOVE are crap ...
28th April 2013: what goes around, comes around?
19th April 2013: everyone's a victim these days ...
10th April 2013: Thatcher is dead; long live Thatcher!
8th April 2013: Poor people are such a nuisance. Just give them loads of money and they'll go away ...
26th March 2013: Censorship is alive and well and coming for you ...
25th March 2013: Just do your job properly, is that too much to ask?
25th March 2013: So, what do you think caused your heterosexuality?
20th March 2013: Feminists - puritans, hypocrites or just plain stupid?
18th March 2013: How Nazi Germany paved the way for modern governance?
13th March 2013: Time we all grew up and lived in the real world ...
12th March 2013: Hindenburg crash mystery solved? - don't you believe it!
6th March 2013: Is this the real GOS?
5th March 2013: All that's wrong with taxes
25th February 2013: The self-seeking MP who is trying to bring Britain down ...
24th February 2013: Why can't newspapers just tell the truth?
22nd February 2013: Trial by jury - a radical proposal
13th February 2013: A little verse for two very old people ...
6th February 2013: It's not us after all, it's worms
6th February 2013: Now here's a powerful argument FOR gay marriage ...
4th February 2013: There's no such thing as equality because we're not all the same ...
28th January 2013: Global Warming isn't over - IT'S HIDING!
25th January 2013: Global Warmers: mad, bad and dangerous to know ...
25th January 2013: Bullying ego-trippers, not animal lovers ...
19th January 2013: We STILL haven't got our heads straight about gays ...
16th January 2013: Bullying ego-trippers, not animal lovers ...
11th January 2013: What it's like being English ...
7th January 2013: Bleat, bleat, if it saves the life of just one child ...
7th January 2013: How best to put it? 'Up yours, Argentina'?
7th January 2013: Chucking even more of other people's money around ...
6th January 2013: Chucking other people's money around ...
30th December 2012: The BBC is just crap, basically ...
30th December 2012: We mourn the passing of a genuine Grumpy Old Sod ...
30th December 2012: How an official body sets out to ruin Christmas ...
16th December 2012: Why should we pardon Alan Turing when he did nothing wrong?
15th December 2012: When will social workers face up to their REAL responsibility?
15th December 2012: Unfair trading by a firm in Bognor Regis ...
14th December 2012: Now the company that sells your data is pretending to act as watchdog ...
7th December 2012: There's a war between cars and bikes, apparently, and  most of us never noticed!
26th November 2012: The bottom line - social workers are just plain stupid ...
20th November 2012: So, David Eyke was right all along, then?
15th November 2012: MPs don't mind dishing it out, but when it's them in the firing line ...
14th November 2012: The BBC has a policy, it seems, about which truths it wants to tell ...
12th November 2012: Big Brother, coming to a school near you ...
9th November 2012: Yet another celebrity who thinks, like Jimmy Saville, that he can behave just as he likes because he's famous ...
5th November 2012: Whose roads are they, anyway? After all, we paid for them ...
7th May 2012: How politicians could end droughts at a stroke if they chose ...
6th May 2012: The BBC, still determined to keep us in a fog of ignorance ...
2nd May 2012: A sense of proportion lacking?
24th April 2012: Told you so, told you so, told you so ...
15th April 2012: Aah, sweet ickle polar bears in danger, aah ...
15th April 2012: An open letter to Anglian Water ...
30th March 2012: Now they want to cure us if we don't believe their lies ...
28th February 2012: Just how useful is a degree? Not very.
27th February 2012: ... so many ways to die ...
15th February 2012: DO go to Jamaica because you definitely WON'T get murdered with a machete. Ms Fox says so ...
31st January 2012: We don't make anything any more
27th January 2012: There's always a word for it, they say, and if there isn't we'll invent one
26th January 2012: Literary criticism on GOS? How posh!
12th December 2011: Plain speaking by a scientist about the global warming fraud
9th December 2011: Who trusts scientists? Apart from the BBC, of course?
7th December 2011: All in all, not a good week for British justice ...
9th November 2011: Well what d'you know, the law really IS a bit of an ass ...

 

 
Captain Grumpy's bedtime reading. You can buy them too, if you think you're grumpy enough!
More Grumpy Old Sods on the net

 

 
Older stuff
 

 

 

 

 

 

 
We have written before about the excellent Association of British Drivers. Here are a few choice titbits culled from the recent edition of their members' newsletter "On the road" ...
 

 
The infamous TRL 421 report (Transport Research Laboratory: "The effects of drivers' speed on the frequency of road accidents") contains this intriguing statement:
 
On rural roads, speed management measures that target specific problems or specific roads are more likely to be justifiable in terms of accident reduction than 'blanket' speed management measures. In particular, a reduction in the national speed limit on rural single-carriageway A and B class roads to 50mph, is likely to be effective in reducing accidents only on a modest proportion of roads. Targeting 'problem' roads would be a more effective strategy.
 
Bearing this in mind, how can the government justify a proposed blanket reduction in the national speed limit to 50mph?
 

 
The Greater Manchester Casualty Reduction Partnership has invested in new CCTV cars to catch drivers using mobile phones or otherwise distracted at the wheel. The Smart cars feature a 12ft mast with a camera attached; they park at junctions to monitor traffic. Amazingly, after just a few weeks of use, Mike Downes of the CRP claimed the scheme "was successfully driving the number of accidents down". Intriguing. What's even more intriguing is that when pressed by the local media, figures on the numbers of people caught using this technology were unavailable – although they somehow managed to come up with a set of figures proving the scheme to be a success. Odd that.
 
That's good. They want to catch people out being distracted at the wheel, by placing at busy road junctions something that's almost guaranteed to distract drivers as they wonder what the hell it is. Yep, that'll work.
 

 
Accidents have risen by a quarter and casualties have almost doubled since a Gatso was installed on the M11 at its junction with the North Circular A406 near Woodford, Essex. It's estimated to catch up to 500 drivers a day, generating nearly £1m a year in fines. The camera, jointly run by Essex Council, the police and the Highways Agency, is on the southbound M11 where the road narrows from three lanes to two and the speed limit drops from 70mph to 50mph. Figures released under Freedom of Information laws show that in the five years before the camera was put up, there were 13 accidents and 14 casualties. In the following five years, the number of accidents rose to 16 and casualties to 24.
 
Isn't this the same camera that someone vandalised a couple of years ago by hitching it up to a lorry and letting in the clutch? I do hope so.
 

 
The ABD has always taken a robust attitude to the Global Warming fraud, because of course it's often motorists who get the blame for this imaginary problem ...
 
Met Office scientists fear distorted climate change claims could undermine efforts to tackle carbon emissions. In an article published recently, Dr Vicky Pope, Head of Climate Change Advice at the Met Office, calls on scientists and journalists to stop misleading the public with "claim and counter-claim". Pope says there's little evidence to support claims that Arctic ice has reached a tipping point and could disappear within a decade or so, as reports suggest. "The record-breaking losses in the past couple of years could easily be due to natural fluctuations in the weather, with summer ice increasing again over the next few years" she says.
 
But we could have told her this all along. Still, we aren't scientists, are we, so what we know can't possibly be real.
 

 
An ABD member sent in this exchange, which he'd spotted spotted on an internet newsgroup ...
 
Yesterday I drove down a main road near Wrotham in Kent, and I noticed on each side of the two-way road, facing oncoming traffic, was a camera unit of some kind on a tripod, with a cable descending to a box beneath. I could see no-one with them and no indication what they were. Parked a few yards back in a layby was a chap in plain clothes, sitting in the back of an unmarked Citreon. I turned round my car, went back and also parked in the layby. I got out my video camera (kept for such occasions) and walked towards his car.
 
I noticed a yellow reflective jacket on the front seat and wisely concluded that the cameras were something to do with him - so I then walked around his vehicle filming him, his vehicle and the cameras. I then went back to my car. As I started the engine, he quickly walked up to me, so I wound down the window and the exchange started:
 
Him: What do you think you're doing?
Me: Filming. What were you doing?
Him: Filming.
Me: Well we're doing the same thing aren't we?
Him: Yes but I don't WANT to be filmed.
Me: NOR do I
Him: But that's my job!
Me: That's my job too!
Him: Who are you then?
Me: Who are you?
Him: I want to know who YOU are.
Me: I want to know who YOU are.
Him: I'm here for the council
Me: I'm here for the public
Him: You can't take film for the public
Me: Why
Him: Because you have to work for someone
Me: I do
Him: Who?
Me: The public
Him: What do you mean the public?
Me: I work for a group of people who don't like being filmed, and they pay me to take film of anyone who starts filming them. In fact I go round looking for people like you.
Him: What do you do with the film?
Me: What do YOU do with the film?
Him: I give it to the council. What do you do with your film?
Me: I give it to the public
Him: Well I don't want to be on your film, so I'm going to ask you to destroy it straight away.
Me: Well I don't want to be on your film either, so I want you to destroy yours straight away.
Him: I can't.
Me: Neither can I
Him: Well just you make sure you don't use any of that film of me.
Me: Ok And just you make sure you don't use any of that film of me.
Him: Ok.
Me: I still don't understand what the purpose of YOUR film is, what do they use it for?
Him: I don't know. They don't tell us what it's for, we just have to go out and do it!
Me: God. How long have you been doing this?
Him: On and off for three weeks.
Me: Three weeks! And you don't know what it's for?
Him: No. How long have you been doing it then?
Me: About six years
Him: Oh I couldn't stand it that long.
Me: No I'm thinking of giving it up soon.
Him: Yeah well, I better go now. Nice talking.
Me: Yeah great, mind how you go.
 
He then waved me goodbye as I drove off. What he didn't know was I was also recording the conversation too! But hey, I made him a promise.
 

 
"Our opponents would be ridiculed if they advocated motorist-grade restrictive measures elsewhere. Would they advocate that pedestrians are specifically banned from using mobile phones when they cross a road, because they should be concentrating 100%?
 
Sadly, some children die as they trespass on railway tracks. I don't see pressure groups demanding that all trains be slowed down to 2mph on the grounds that 'if it saved just one life it would be worth it'."
 

 
But it's not all doom and gloom - there are some reports we can draw satisfaction from ...
 

 
The driver of a scamera van in Phoenix, Arizona was shot and killed recently. Doug Georgianni had parked his van, marked as a Department of Public Safety (DPS) vehicle when a Chevy Suburban pulled alongside and fired at least five shots, killing Georgianni.
 

 
There's been a big fall in the number of speeding penalties, after police and local authorities lost the right to keep the proceeds. The drop came in the same year that road deaths fell to their lowest level since records began, undermining claims that an increase in cameras improves road safety. In 2007, 1.26m fixed penalties were issued, down 370,000, or 23%, on the previous year. Over the same period, road deaths fell below 3000 for the first time, down 226 to 2946.
 
Until 1 April 2007, camera partnerships operated by police and local authorities were allowed to keep a proportion of fines to pay for more cameras. Since then, they have received a fixed amount for all aspects of road safety. The drop in fines suggests police chiefs have put fewer resources into speed enforcement now they can't recover the costs of installing and operating cameras. Many camera housings are being left empty and some forces have reduced their use of camera vans.
 
Thames Valley Police recorded the steepest fall in camera fines, down from 137,000 in 2006 to 54,000 in 2007. The Metropolitan Police and the Bedfordshire, Essex and Wiltshire forces also recorded substantial falls. The number of drivers caught using handheld mobile phones also fell in 2007, down 27% to 122,000.
 

 
Swindon's council has voted to press ahead with plans to pull out of the town's safety camera partnership and restructure road safety. The cameras started disappearing in June to be replaced by vehicle-activated signs. The focus will be on education, with road safety lessons given to children, said a council spokesman.
 
Well, that's a stunner - a local authority exercising common-sense? It'll never catch on.
 

 
Grumpy Old Sod.com - homepage
 

 
Use this Yahoo Search box to find more grumpy places,
either on this site or on the World Wide Web.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
Copyright © 2009 The GOS
 
Grumpy Old Sod.com - homepage

 

Captain Grumpy's
Favourites
- some older posts

 
Campaign
 
Proposal
 
Burglars
 
Defence
 
ID cards
 
Old folk
 
Hairy man
 
Democracy
 
Mud
 
The NHS
 
Violence
 
Effluent
 
Respect
 
Litter
 
Weapons
 
The church
 
Blame
 
Parenting
 
Paedophiles
 
The Pope
 
Punishing
 
Racism
 
Scientists
 
Smoking
 
Stupidity
 
Swimming
 
Envirocrap
 
Spying